The Three Conversations of Leadership – How Leaders Drive Results by Having The Conversations That Matter

IHHP – Institute for Health and Human Potential http://www.ihhp.com/

“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place” George Bernard Shaw

 

We all have relationships at work that aren’t working. This is not surprising, given how the pressure of time and need for results can cause people to have impact they don’t intend. What is surprising, however, is the lack of skill and ability most people have to deal with the relationships that aren’t working.

Leaders want to make their relationships work, they want to give performance reviews that make a difference, they want to give informal feedback that improves clarity and performance, they want to be better leaders. Most, unfortunately, are just not sure where to begin.

The Three Conversations of Leadership provides leaders with the tools and strategies needed to build effective relationships at work. Not only to deal with the relationships at risk that keep them up at night but to grow the kind of robust relationships that drive great results.

In this program, participants learn the crucial Emotional Intelligence, http://www.ihhp.com/what_is_eq.htm skills needed to more effectively:

- Give honest and candid feedback

- Hold people accountable

- Deliver bad news

- Engage people when rolling out change; and,

- Speak truth when there is tension and conflict

The Three Conversations of Leadership – Managing Emotions in the Conversation

The key to having effective conversations is to manage the emotions that are at work for both people in the conversation. The Three Conversations of Leadership sheds light on what emotions might be driving behavior for both people and helps leaders effectively manage their emotions in order to communicate more effectively.

Learning Outcomes

Participants will:

- Understand the three conversations of leadership the daily, the difficult and the courageous.

- Be able to build relationships based on trust and respect that comes with having effective Daily Conversations.

- Learn and practice techniques for having Difficult Conversations:

- Giving honest and candid feedback without leaving the other person feeling “beaten up”

- Holding people accountable in an engaging way

- Giving bad news or saying “no” in a way that ensures the person still feels valued n Begin to learn the Art of Courageous Conversations: techniques to speak your truth when there is tension and conflict that is impacting an important relationship.

The Three Conversations of Leadership gives leaders new insight into what is getting in the way of their most important work – and personal – relationships. It provides them with tools to more effectively have the conversations that matter and drive results. Leaders will also find peace of mind because they are finally dealing with issues they know they need to deal with.

 

BASICS OF LEADERSHIP SKILLS AND QUALITIES, BUSINESS AND EDUCATIONAL LEADERSHIP EXAMPLES

(Based on author’s site www.geocities.com/ldrsp)

Leadership qualities matter in business, in education. Yet the doctoral student can’t find information on leadership skills. If the discipline isn’t leadership she has to cry for help: What’re leadership qualities?! Others would like to know too what are the personal qualities of leadership! Business leadership is important. Educational leadership is in demand. But, what are leadership skills, qualities?

Reason for Leadership

Interest they have in business or educational leadership. Perhaps also leadership qualities. Knowledge of what is leadership, not. If they see a worker a few times resting who routinely unloads, sorts, stacks, rests, repeats, he is lazy. That’s not good leadership! If leadership qualities or skills are lacking it causes annoyance, loss of production.

Need for Leadership

Leadership in education or business are acquirable skills.

In Britain there is confusion on what is leadership. The Department of Employment has publications on how to train, e.g., supervisors. Yet even supervision are known to have been deemed by the Training & Enterprise Councils to be an inherent quality, by the Employment Tribunals with members from the Trades Union Congress and the Confederation of British Industry not an acquirable skill. In the USA the position is not dissimilar.

Leadership qualities aren’t the same as leadership skills.

There are exceptional ‘born leaders’, extraordinary circumstances calling for inherent leadership qualities for exceptional motivation with no apparent incentives. But routine administration, business leadership or educational leadership demand only professional acquirable skills.

Leadership qualities are different than leadership skills.

Popularity in Leadership

Approaches to administrative leadership differ. Business leadership strategies vary. Educational leadership policies change. So do leadership skills. The value of leadership qualities never change.

Leadership is about people. Good leadership is popularity based. A French emperor called his soldiers his children, after a defeat again raised volunteer armies. A popular Scottish preacher got nominated for the US senate.

Leadership qualities are inherent. But leadership skills often suffice. Both involve popularly interesting people.

Popularity aids leadership qualities. It helps leadership skills. So in business or educational leadership.

What is Leadership?

Charisma alone it isn’t. Nor is it love, care, perseverance that enables popularity in successful leadership. It is also an interest in understanding the human nature, knowing what motivates. That is the basis of leadership.

A car plant boss praises the night shift’s work, the day shift competes for equal pride, production increases.

A congressional medal, the offer to be Education Secretary, a biographical movie for a Chicago school teacher who enabled exam. success for eleven pupils was because she could get from them what an education authorities’ educational leadership skills couldn’t.

Personal Qualities of Leadership

Depending on approaches, business and educational leadership classifications vary. Basically all leadership are of two kinds: leadership and exceptional leadership.

The former is leaderships skills; acquired, ordinarily, routinely at work: e.g., leadership in education, business.

The latter is based on inherent leadership qualities. It enables exceptional motivation with incentives hardly perceptible in extreme inappetence. It is the most rare extraordinary leadership, enhanced by the most exceptional leader’s charisma, communication ability, wit, trustworthiness, with much philosophical, sociological, psychological insight, high logical reasoning ability, the vision, heroic courage, love, care, dedication, passion of rational sensible idealism, sacrifice in time, effort. This ‘moves mountains’; be it leadership in education, culture, religion, politics, business, it reforms: socially and historically visibly, lastingly, memorably changes established culture, life styles, society.

Exceptional leadership, business or educational or other -in one field or more, of historical noteworthiness demands personal qualities, for it begins with popularity that is not coerced but is by virtue of, irrespective of wealth or position, at personal level earned and deserved trust and faith in the genuineness, sincerity of one’s intentions -honesty in intention.

Professional Leadership

What is routinely at work is skills based leadership. Mostly it is leadership in education or in business, of the kind that acquirable skills are adequate for. It does not demand any exceptional leadership qualities. Acquirable are interested behaviour and competence. Proportionately to one’s degree of interest, basic leadership skills often suffice to function as a professional leader, to lead in one’s field.

On professional leadership many have written. There are commonly agreed basic modern leadership principles generally adequate in any field of average competence.

Effective Leadership

Leaders with leadership qualities or skills know this: The average employee does like to be so directed as presumes that he generally wishes to avoid responsibility with relatively little or no ambition and dislikes work except to the extent essential for survival with basic security. People have an inherent need in an adult way to exercise their understanding, capacities, skills motivated by incentives also non-economic and culturally varying. This appreciation is a must for effective leadership.

Leadership Values

Trustworthiness is one of the personal qualities of leadership that can never be imitated in professional leadership for truly great achievement. But the skilful appearance of trustworthiness succeeds. Usually the only task of professional leadership is obtaining the co-operation of colleagues and employees.

This is best done, by making the organisation’s objects or visions pursued or desired of personal significance to people. That must be based on their values and expectations to generate their energy and enthusiasm. Good leadership on that basis can prepare people for the various controllable and uncontrollable changes, appreciating that leadership attitudes matter above all and must be ‘trust’ based… In the 1990s’ England an industrial strike over pay continued after Railtrak agreed: the workers had discovered that the government had secretly sought to influence the negotiations.

Leadership Strategies

Trust is the most useful of leadership values. Good leaders’ people feel valued. Job satisfaction enhances performance and productivity and job satisfaction includes feeling valued. This leadership strategy avoids dissatisfaction, increases job satisfaction. Co-operation is based on others feeling valued enough to be trusted.

Information works at two levels: it shows trust and contributes to the leader’s objective others’ valid views.

The value of other’s valid views which free flow of information (or the successful [but risky] appearance of it) enables is not overlooked in good leadership. In, e.g., educational leadership staff’s familiarity with consumer culture, in business leadership workers’ consumer choices reduce the risk of missing the wood for the trees.

In leadership strategies learning from experience by trial & error is unaffordable in the short term. The complexities of long term results necessitate cultured thought.

Leadership Policies

If one looks at some educational leadership policies and business leadership examples one sees these:-

In the 1980s’ UK’s teacher surplus was followed by teacher shortage; in c. 2000 allegations of easy examination questions came to be replaced, with accusations of unanswerable examination questions being set, by allegations of school pupils being deliberately failed.

The British farmers union’s lateness in taking into account the effects of the European Union agreements enabling workers general employment rights in member states as opposed to previous restrictions on the types of employment, in 2007 resulted in loss of profits to many farmers because tons of strawberies could not be picked with less students and holiday workers from member states available for that particular type of employment.

In the 1980s’ USA, People’s Express Airlines folded – cheaper seats but they couldn’t see seat booking preferences. In the 2000s’ UK, Aria Technology Limited, its owner telling of having sold goods at 500% profit, in a matter of refunding about £100 for re-saleable goods estimated only the faxes it received to have cost it about £500. The USA’s regarding failure as experience for businesses meant an average pre-bankruptcy life of 11 years; and by the time it saw and began to adopt the European thought of motivating for pride in the job, Japan and Germany had captured 38% of the car market.

In thought based leadership ~in verse by Orhan Seyfi Ari -translated:

To overtake and win, like horses that race

Compete ideas in a head keen, to make the best choice

Leadership Qualities

In leadership it is generally agreed that personal leadership qualities mater. Success in leadership depends also on the degree of the knowledge, understanding and appreciation of the needs and the expectations of those who are to be led, and of how the group is structured -especially as to the relevant situation immediately confronting them in their environment.

What exactly are the personal qualities of exceptional leaders, in leadership of historical noteworthiness, have not been able the psychologists to ascertain in terms of specific character or personality traits. But professional leadership also is people based and it often suffices to ‘Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.’

Leadership Skills

Personal qualities of leadership enhance professional skills. But in no field are called for exceptional personal leadership qualities or even professional skills routinely. In ordinary, e.g., business or educational leadership to envision and enable, to empower and energise routinely basic leadership skills suffice. These comprise simply of the knowledge of, and an honest intention to also cater for, the expectations of those to be lead, any problems faced in terms of their means, abilities, social influences.

In ordinary routine leadership, subject to average competence in one’s field, nothing is basically essential other than this leadership appreciation and reasonable honesty -i.e., simply treating people as people.

May interest -he ‘moved mountains’ Teacher’s Leadership